I will not be sad to see this year come to an end. The word I chose at the beginning of this year was perseverance. This was such a perfect word for me because I’ve been challenged more this year then I can remember in a long time. Throughout all the challenges I have to say that I’ve grown so much in so many areas of my life. I believe with all the things I have endured this year that God prepared me in a huge way for Covid. I started my year three weeks into January and I hurt my SI joint and hip at work. I was off work for two and a half months. It’s really hard to look after yourself when your on your own, but my friends from church stepped in and cooked me meals for a couple of weeks. That was so nice for each of them to come to my home. I knew I was loved.
I had physio often and then WCB sent me to bootcamp. That about killed me. Who in their right mind works out 4 hours a day. WCB wanted me to join this gym and that’s how long you were expected to come in and workout. I think their Motto is no pain no gain. Thank goodness I was working small amounts to get back to work. Then Covid hit and Spring break and we didn’t go back to school. I was used to being at home so it wasn’t that bad for me.
In the end of May I broke my finger. It’s the third time I’ve broken the tip on this finger. Holy cow I had forgotten that broken fingers hurt like hell. I could morning. Good thing we had Cerb which helped me through 6 more months of no work. School remained close only to those for essential workers and I could not work with a broken finger. So I went to physio for it.
I stopped going to a counselor I had gone to for 6 years. I never realized how much I relied on this person for so many things. It has been a hard transition but I know I’m in a much healthier place and with a really good support system I know I can do this. Grief has been hard and plentiful for me this year as well. Living in my own without my husband, learning all the things it takes to look after a home in your own it’s a lot but I’ve been doing it. Grief from not having my counselor in my life the transition was hard for me and then the death of my grandpa. He lived to almost be 105. New years eve would have been his birthday. When you lose someone all that grief from all the other people comes trickling back. I’ve cried a lot this year.
Tears are good and healthy and a must to continue forward in this life. Pain makes one preservere more. On Monday I needed that perseverance so much when God had me come home from work because of snow. Thank goodness He did because there was a flood in my basement and I pumped water out of it for 6 and a half hours. I was so exhausted from lifting up the heavy shop vac to the sink to dump out the water. As this year comes to a close I will be thinking of a new word for 2021.
What word will you choose for the next year?
Beauty from Ashes. 