Standing up for what is right…

After being bullied as a kid for years from so many people and into my adult life. I don’t understand if you’ve been abused why people think they can continue to pick on me. One thing I did learn was that I now can stand up for what is right and stand up for myself. I’m no longer that child or teen that can’t stick up for themselves or defend themselves. It’s almost like we get a target on our backs. I hate it so much and as an adult have had to set really clear boundaries with people in my life.

I don’t want people in my life that treat me badly so I cut them out of my life. Life is too short to have to deal with drama but what do you do when someone in your family is doing that to you. I find it interesting that this family member said they would never be like our dad but last night and many other nights I realized that’s he’s just like our dad. He’s been stressed and when he’s stressed he takes it out on me for the most stupid things. They are not worth freaking out about. Our dad used to do the same things he’d freak out and yell at us as kids and then beat us. This family member does not hit me but those words of verbal abuse are brutal. Last night I was told that I manipulate others so much to get what I want. Really because anybody who knows me that’s not how they would describe me.

I stood up for myself and they freaked out more at me yelling and screaming at me. The words hurt and what I’ve learned about verbal abuse is it sticks with you for a long time. He won’t apologize and my mom says it’s because of how they grew up. Really because I grew up the same way and I never ever have treated someone like that when I’m upset. This person has a choice and this is what they are choosing. Today it was like nothing happened last night. They were all nice and great and giving me a hug. That’s what abusers do smooth over and pretend it never happened until the next time.

There will be no next time because I’m done with the verbal abuse no more dinners no more family things. It saddens me so much but if I don’t do this, this abuse continues. I put up with so much verbal abuse in my life. It has to stop sometime so I’m going to stop it. It’s hard to stand up to those who treat you badly but if you don’t they will continue to abuse you.

After leading the life I had I have zero tolerance for bullying for adults or children. I’m so glad that I’m healthy now and can see when this is happening and remove myself from it. It’s very empowering and helps me to help others. You do not have to be around people like that family or not. I’ve worked so hard in my life to keep out toxic people and no matter how hard it is I will continue to do it. I so appreciate all the people I have in my life who love and support me and have helped me become the strong woman I am today.

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