I woke up this morning excited to see what this year will bring. It’s like buying a new journal that you’ve not written in before. It’s a clean slate to do what you need to do to succeed, what choices you will make, how you will handle hard things that come your way. What things do you have in your toolbox? A huge thing for me last year was my mindset. It effects everything in your life. If my mindset is negative it’s harder for me to achieve what I set out to do. If my mindset is positive then the opportunites are endless.
Lots of people make New Years Resolutions. I gave up on that a long time ago because by February or so I had not gotten anywhere in the right direction and I would feel defeated. Instead I have words I’ve used for the past 4 years or so. Words that can better me In my year. I feel that words take that pressure off me and I’m able to keep that positive mindset.
I started out my year without the financial burden of my credit card. For two years I tried to get it down so that I could not feel like I was strangled so much. Between the fees for it being in arrears and the monthly fee I could never move it. Every month I was stressed about money. That weighs down on your mindset and your health. That’s not a healthy way to live. I also made the decision to let go of my husband that I had been married for 19 years and move forward from that. Another thing weighing me down heavily. I’m done with all the Spiritual and emotional abuse. I need heathier things in my life and I’ve chosen to step away from all of that. I find that hard because I’ve known him for 24 years that’s a long time to know someone. I’m looking forward to learning how to not communicate with this person and how to move forward from this.
I believe it’s one foot in front of the other. I look forward to doing the hard work to keeping this person in my past. I need people in my life who build me up, who love and support me no matter what. I have two specific people like that in my life who tell me that they are proud of me. Those words keep me moving in the right direction. One of these people who I owe part of my life to. A person who stood by me in the grips of addiction, who walked beside me in my darkest days. Who kept me going in the right direction.
The other person who showed me about forgiveness and how God was with me when I had called out to Him as a child. Forgiveness that changed the course of my life and how this was the root to my addiction unforgivness. Instead of hate I feel love. Love that God shows me everyday. I am blessed.
Beauty from Ashes. 