Beauty from Ashes.

Today has been week since the ostrichs have been slaughtered. I miss watching them on the lives that were on the farm. I love how curious they were and they loved people. People came from far and wide to see them. Many of them lived for 35 years raised from chicks. They all had names and everyone of them loved to be called by them. They would dance and twirl when they were really happy. They were pets at the farm. I’ve seen some beautiful videos of them with their owners.

Here are some facts about ostrichs from the internet. Ostriches are large, flightless birds native to Africa that are known for their speed, size, and large eggs. They are the world’s tallest and heaviest birds, reaching up to 9 feet tall and weighing over 300 pounds, and are capable of running up to 45 mph. They are omnivores that live in grasslands and savannas, have a lifespan of 30-40 years in the wild, and use powerful kicks to defend themselves. 

These ostrichs had herd immunity used in Science in Japan to use their antibodies. They were going to be used for our good in our world to help wipe out H1N1. This is destroying our farmers and their animals. It also had antibodies to help with Covid 19.  So for the good I’m our country. All wiped out because we are being forced to take medications not using natural things.

Another reason I joined the company that I use. It’s drug free technology that using zero drugs based on science. It feels good to stand with people and companies like this.

Today all over the world people are lighting candles to remember these mighty creatures. Yesterday the CFIA and the RCMP left the farm. Destroyed the land and left the kill pen for them to clean up. Justice will prevail. The truth will shed light on this darkness. To the 330 ostrichs your lives will not be in vain.

Here is a great video to end this blog. To see how happy each of these birds was and how they were loved to the end.

https://youtu.be/K4TdTSbAzpo?si=OsyiW8RYNh1vxJLQ

I don’t usually get involved with things that are happening around the world, especially in my country. I’ve been quiet because I’m in shock and been so numb I couldn’t breathe. I wrote about the Universal Ostrich Farm in my last blog and followed what has been happening. I saw things that I can’t believe are happening in Canada.

Last Thursday the Supreme Court dismissed the case so the ostrichs were to be culled. Without any warning to anybody on the farm the family, people that were there to support them including children. The CFIA rounded up the ostrichs into the kill pen they had made. They waited until it was dark and for hours on end they shot 900 to 1,000 rounds of ammunition killing the healthy birds. Apparently it’s illegal to shoot any animal in the dark.

I’m not putting up photos because even just writing this is hard. The ostrichs were massacred in the night leaving the family and others around them traumatized. This is in Canada. Really because I feel like this was a war zone and like we were in Afghanistan. I saw war when I lived in Ireland. This was on a farm in the middle of nowhere in Canada. This was the bloodiest kill ever.

How is this right! Why couldn’t the CFIA have followed their rules that they make to cull so that it doesn’t traumatize the birds in the process. The farm is fighting back with many Canadians that these rules need to changed and there is huge investigation in how things were handled on the farm. The RCMP continue to be there 6 days later and the CFIA are covering up the slaughter.

To top it off the ostrichs were put into big garbage bins and taken to Vancouver to dispose of them. These are the same birds they claimed were infected. They were healthy for 11 months. Disposed of like trash. It’s devestating. That family and others will never be the same again. The words from the farmers were they messed with the wrong family.

Maybe the birds dying will be part of the change we need in Canada. I pray that the polices will change so that no farmer will ever have to go through this again. I pray people will wake up. Our country is in trouble.

Today is Remembrance Day and we stand and honor those who died and have fought for our country. There is a retired Sargent right now at the farm. His name is Mike Rudd he fought for our country in places like Afghanistan, and Bosnia. He watched many people die on the front lines and to this day he serves people and gives back. He said the other day to the RCMP why did I go and fight to make Canada free? We need to wake up.

I feel righteous anger and have shed many tears. This is not right the way this whole thing played out. I know the ostrichs are dancing now in heaven and their family will see them again. I pray that their deaths change will come.

Thank you to all the men and woman who have died and have served and are serving our country. May we Remember each of you today.

I hate Halloween so much. I often feel uneasy about it and I hate scary costumes. As a kid growing up in Ireland I can remember wanting to go out and trick a treat and my family not letting me go for whatever stupid reason they came with. Like most holidays I had to sit and watch my siblings participate. I would cry so much and if I did get to go. I was frightened by people’s costumes. It was always so dark and I just felt uneasy.

As an adult now I know that I’m safe but I still dislike the holiday so much. I don’t dress up at school. I will wear orange and black. I enjoy seeing the kids costumes they are cute and kids love Halloween. I usually just watch Tv and hang out like every other night.

This year I’m on my clean eating plan so no candy for me. Safe safe out there everyone.

Today I was reminded that even if something is hard you don’t quit. I’ve never quit anything in my life and today I was not going to start and do it now. Today was our pro d and I stayed at home and worked on a course that can help me in my Early Childhood Education at school. I started early so that I could finish earlier. I read all the things that needed to be read. I followed along in my book and I took notes. It took me a couple of hours. Then you have to do a quiz to get a certificate that will help with my hours of education that I need.

You had to get 70% to pass. The first time I got 61.9. My second time I got 66.9% my third time I got 66.9%. What is totally stupid is they don’t tell you what you got wrong so how the Heck do you know which ones are right and wrong. I have absolutely no idea. Apparently you can take the test as many times as needed. It’s been so frustrating and in the end I just stopped. I’ve left it. I can go on with the course and have to take more tests to get certificates.

I felt defeated because I have zero idea what ones I need to correct. I understand they want you to know the material but really this is a free course. I’m wondering how many times I have to take the quiz to pass. Each time I take it in more frustrated and when I get like that I can’t make head or tail what is happening. I spent 4 hours on this today. I feel like just giving up.

How many times in our lives are things hard and we want to give up? If I had given up on half the things I wanted to in my life. I would be dead. I think I will go back through the material again and take the test again. I don’t want to give up even though I really want to. I’m listening to a song right now that’s called High Hopes and it’s about not giving up no matter what. It’s a song that’s become part of my life. Good song to encourage me.

So no matter how hard something is, you can choose the easy way out or you can choose to be successful no matter how hard it is. Life is not always easy. Tomorrow is a new day. ❤️

Sorry I seemed to have fallen off the face of the earth. Work is so busy I’m often tired at night to start all over again the next day. We have a lot of needs in Kindergarten this year. More then I’ve ever seen in all the years I’ve worked at school. It’s good though and I’m learning to take something small from each day as a blessing. Sometimes they are big things as well. I was getting bogged down with how much I had to do at work everyday. Now I look for those chances to see something great. I had to change my mindset otherwise the weight of it all would crush you.

Every year the Lord puts a child or children into my class that need me. 3 weeks into school He made it very clear to me who was there for me to help. As the weeks have gone by I have gotten to know this child well and I’ve been building a trust. They seek me out or if the child is sad I try to help them feel better. This one is a hard one. I’m also meeting a lot of different needs in my class. I’m so glad I’m working with an amazing teacher who has a heart like mine. Another blessing.

Last weekend I got to hang out with my favorite kid. I realized that I’ve not been laughing much. He makes me smile and laugh often. Wow he’s growing up so fast. I also realized I needed to laugh more. They say laughter is the best medicine.

This past year I committed to work on my health. I went to physio and worked on strengthening my core and my balance. I participated in two challenges through the company I work for. Things I never imagined I could ever do. Push up and plank challenge and sit ups and squats. Completed both 30 day challenges. I lost 9lbs and just joined a program called Lifestyle RX it’s run though our health care so it’s free to everyone. It will help me get my blood sugars down to normal and teach me how to eat better, sleep, excerise and control your stress.

I had very extensive blood work done and they work with your doctor. They suggest I lose 30lbs. I need to get into a healthy range with my weight or I  will have huge medical issues. The program is 3 months but then they keep checking in on you so you don’t get lost in the system. I’m excited that I can be healthy and feel better in my life and learn how to eat and be healthy in my entire life. I’m excited that I can do this without taking a drug to help me lose weight. I’m excited that every week I will meet with others who have joined the program and learn more about me. It’s time to learn a new way. I learned this weekend that if you have higher blood sugars that you can’t lose weight. That explains a lot.

This year I also joined a gut health group. I’ve learned so many amazing things. I started a product called Zive 7 and it has changed my gut in ways I could never imagine. I’ve been off PPI’s acid reflux medicine for a month now. I never thought that would ever happen. I have a head cold right now but for the first time in my life it’s not as bad as it would have been before with a screwed up gut. I’m learning amazing ways to change. I’m learning about inflammation and how to reduce it. I’ve lost a lot of belly fat what was from bloat. I’m excited about this health journey and have met amazing people on this journey. I will keep you updated on the results.

So much to be grateful for. Remember to stop and smell the roses as they say. Find the little things in your life that bring you joy. 🌹

I have always stood up for what is right no matter how hard it is. I know this comes from how I was treated as a child. I had no voice and was unable to stand up for what I needed to. After I left that horrible place I grew up in and  worked on myself a lot, I vowed that I would be a voice for the voiceless. That’s what I’ve done. I’ve stood in the gap for others.

I hate confrontation but I hate more how people treat others. I have zero tolerance for it. I’ve had to make hard decisions where I was the only one who stood up for what was right. I was known as a trouble maker in my jobs. So standing up for what is right is a trouble maker wow. I have protected children and stood against the people that bullied them. I have stood up to bullies. When you get bullied a lot as a kid and are defenseless it’s time to stand for what you believe in.

I’ve had to challenge people and ask them how do you sleep at night knowing these things are going on. I’ve gone to the authorities and stood on my own to protect children. Recently I went for an interview and experienced a man who tried to intimate me and critized my answers. I’m not really sure why he was there. I then wasn’t sure how I was supposed to answer what I was asked. I was really upset when I left and I’m writing a letter to the board to tell them that it was very inappropriate how I was treated. If I don’t speak out then how many more people have experienced what I have. I’m sure I’m not the only person. That is not a place I want to live in. Nobody ever should feel intimidated by someone who thinks they have power over you.

I’m so glad God’s given me a voice to continue to speak out for what is wrong. Stand in the gap for others. Stand up for what is right in this world even if you have to do it on your own.

Look at these faces all innocent animals that are not being tested to see if they have the avian flu. In the coming days they may very well be culled but they are not sick. For the last 10 months none of them have been sick.

About a week ago one of my friends put up a very heart breaking video on Facebook about a lady Katie Pasitney who part owns Universal Ostrich Farm in Edgewood, BC Canada.  The video wow was a plea for her 330 ostrichs to get tested. I had heard about this farm before but really had no idea what was happening. I started to watch and see what was happening. It was like watching a movie but no this is in the same province that I live in. This is reality.

Her mother Karen Espersen and business owner Dave Bilinski have run this farm for 35 years. Last December a duck flew over their farm and brought with them the Avian flu. They lost about 70 ostrichs. Ever since then the CFIA the Canadian federal government for safety of Canada’s food supply have tried to take over the farm. In 10 months not one ostrich has been sick either have the people who run the farm. The animals have built up immunity.

4 days ago I watched Katie and her mother being arrested for being told that they could feed their ostrichs before they were slated to be culled. In fact they were lied to, to get them into the pen so they could be arrested and removed from their farm. The CFIA came and took over the farm and 40 plus police came. Their job the CFIA is to feed and look after the ostrichs. That’s like putting the wolf into the sheep’s pen. They took down the farms security cameras and put tape on them and build walls of hay. This is so the world can’t see them cull these animals. Interesting every night for the last 3 nights the hay bales combust. I believe that is the Lord at work.

The next day after the arrest after Katie and her family had prayed they got a stay order for the ostrichs to be spared their death. Last Thursday the CFIA put in their report and Katie and her family have 2 days which will be Monday to challenge their order.

The family is fighting for all farmers because it’s scary that the government can have that much power and the farmers have nothing. They won’t test the ostrichs because they know that they aren’t sick. If you have followed the story the CFIA aren’t even following protocol. It’s all show the white painters suits and they leave the farm and go and eat at restaurants and sleep at hotels in town. If there was a threat then the family would have been sick and all the people around them.

The ostrichs have been used in Science and have antibodies that cure Covid and H1N1. Their eggs carry the antibodies and for 35 years they have helped change our world. Now the farm is a threat to all of that. That explains why a farm in a very small town is now a target. It’s so much bigger.

I heard today from Katie that the CFIA have been in town trying to rent equipment and buy traps so that when they cull them they can do it in the back of the farm and those tarps do not break down. So on top of it all they will leave the carnigae on the farm.

So I’m reaching out to my blogging community pray that the ostrichs can be tested and saved to continue the work that they have been doing. This is not just about Universal Ostrich Farm. This effects every farmer in Canada. This needs to STOP.

I will leave you with this video that someone made and it speaks loud and clear.

https://youtu.be/pOh6jcEAbO8?si=CUfmFB2a_YxDWGsy

Thanks for listening and I’m so glad that I can be a small part of this because the Truth sets you free and it needs to be told.

Thank you Katie, Karen, Dave and all your families for what you are doing every day with boots on the ground. The world is watching and many are praying. We stand with you during this time. ❤️🙏✝️

Yesterday at school we prepared apples to make applesauce. As I sat here tonight eating this amazing sauce I thought My applesauce is finally done. I’m sitting here eating it and thinking about how delicious it is the apples from my teachers tree and little hands that prepared it. This applesauce is made with love. Even though our class is a tad bit wild at times. The care each child put into cutting these apples was amazing. I will carry that with me when times seem tough. 🍎🍎❤️ I love how each one is them, turned the handle of the cool apple peeler. They were mesmerized how it peeled and the core popped out.

I was sitting at the cutting table but I could hear how each of them thought this was a magic peeler. I love the innocent of children. Then they came to me and with their plastic knives cut the apples. Some of them cut the pieces big, some so carefully cut them so small. Each child taking such care to cut and put it into the crock pot. Not one of them had ever cut anything before let alone apples. They loved it so much.

Unfortunately our crock pot wasn’t working is why I cooked the apples at home. We will bring it back to school cooked for them to try it on Tuesday. I can’t wait to see how they enjoy what they made. I love watching their faces and comments. They were so proud to be able to make something themselves.

So even though I feel overwhelmed sometimes I need to remember that they are so young and they need to be shown how to do many things. Cutting apples for our sauce was not one of them.

I’m struggling right now and thought blogging would help me get into a different mindset. Often if I write things down it helps. I hardly ever get stuck like this anymore. There is a lot going on. It seems as time goes on that I get overwhelmed easier. This week I was thinking that is still grief. My dad has been gone now for almost 8 months. I miss him everyday.

I got super overwhelmed at work this week so much so that I wanted to get in my car and drive away. I instead found a good friend and we chatted about it and she knew exactly what I needed. I love that. I hate feeling overwhelmed instead of wanting to figure it out. I wanted to just leave.

My job is so crazy right now I’m feeling really overwhelmed by it and I’m super confused what I’m supposed to be doing. Yes I’m supposed to be there for the children but 8 children have massive needs. I can’t do all that they need. So I’ve been going full tilt and this week I now hurt my back. I can’t keep up this pace day in and out. I need to find the right balance.

I then wanted to run again and not work in my class because it’s too much. Wow there is a lot of running going on here. What happened to the person who fights for things no matter what? I feel trapped in a box and I don’t know how to fix it. Not everything can be fixed. Yes I’m a fixer and if it can’t be then I want to run.

The flip side of that is I’m valued and need to be just where I am to help the children. I’ve been told that. I think if I run from all the people who need me especially those children who are they going up look up to. Who will they trust? Every year God puts the right children into my class for a reason. Really God did I need 8 children with high needs. Yes my heart is huge so obviously this is what he’s given me. So now I’m off with a sore back I can see clearer that yes this is what I’m doing and I need to embrace what is happening even if it’s crazy. Hopefully I won’t get overwhelmed like that again.

I like being in control and get lost when I can’t be like right now. I never had that control as a child. I realize that I don’t need to be in control that’s God’s job and I need to trust this journey, because he’s never let me down. I’m also waiting for an interview about a place to live that’s cheaper and will help in so many ways. It adds to the things I have on my plate now, but God has given me peace about that and I’m ready for the interview. 

I love that when I feel fear or wanting to run that I can pray and ask the Lord for peace. Peace that transcends only from him. Instantly I feel that surreal peace. Sometimes I will see a bald eagle 🦅 which means to me that God’s got this all under His control and that I will be ok.

So this is part of my journey, I don’t know what it looks like but really who does. See already my mindset has changed. Thanks for listening. How do you feel peace if you feel anxiety? Are there things that can change your mindset?