Living life without addiction

Life is hard enough without having addiction in ones life.   When things get tough the easy thing would be to get caught back in addiction. The hard thing is to choose to stay sober. I find after being in addiction that it’s hard to want to feel those hard feelings. For so long I numbed out feeling anything, it seemed easier to just not deal with what I was going through. Now I’m learning that I won’t die from feeling, yes it’s still uncomfortable but not as scary as it once was.   Now I pray and ask God to give me that peace and to pray about what is triggering me. Recently feelings of rejection came up with someone that I admire very much. After praying about it, I realized that the issue was not me and her but a deeper issue with my dad and stepmom. I ended up forgiving them both again for feeling that massive rejection from them both. A good friend and mentor told me today Jesus was rejected, abandoned, mocked and tortured by Everyone, but Jesus stayed the course He was called to. We all now can choose FREEDOM that His obedience purchased for us. The truth is we are never alone He is always with us!   People will let us down in this world we will feel rejection. What does it matter if the world rejects us as long as we have the Lord and He loves us all no matter is happening in our lives. With Christ in our lives we have everything. That is for sure. My friend is a wise woman and yes it gives me something to think about.   Peter disowned Jesus three times and Peter swore to Jesus, even if I have to die I will never disown you. We simply cannot rely on others what we need to rely on God for. God will never disappoint us He loves us no matter what and is always there for us. I realize that now but for a long time I tossed  Him aside and used addiction to try and soothe my soul. Guess what it never got better, it only made me feel more rejected, unloved and unwanted.   The longer I remain sober the less impulsive I am and I can make those wise decisions in my life. When things get rough I now can CHOOSE to glorify God in my decisions not using selfish ways to get what I want. For me the biggest thing in this life is reading and studying God’s word. As soon as I stop that I quickly become a crazy woman who listens to lies, doubts myself and I just become so unsure. Fear and anxiety are given a foothold in my life and it quickly goes downhill from there.  What kinds of things keep you strong in times of trouble? Feel free to share them with me what works? doesn’t work for you.              

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