Today was a day I did not look forward to but like so many things in our lives sometimes we must say goodbye. I love the above writing about love and the pain of leaving. I especially love the part about if we avoid the suffering of leaving we will never experience the joy of loving. Love is stronger than fear, life stronger than death, hope stronger than dispair. We have to trust that the risk of loving is always worth taking. If I did not trust this person then I would never have experienced the love, caring and compassion I got out of this relationship. Love does hurt so many times in my life. I believe when someone leaves from our lives that God opens other doors.
I’m now so much stronger then when I first came into counselling. My life was very unmanageable. Addiction was huge in my life and my life was a mess. I bearly could hold it together and totally in denial about needing to give up my addiction. I was bitter, angry and full of hatred. I blamed everyone around me. I was the victim. In six years I turned my life around I took responsibility for my actions, I found accountability which it was always hard to keep consistent in my life. I needed someone to challenge me when I tried to lie or step out in addiction. I fought tooth and nail to keep addiction in my life saying that it was fine and it effected no one. I could get around my accountability app and then continue my behaviour. I was challenged often in those times and my counselor still stood beside me and cheered me on after many times of falling. She helped me see how God sees me. When I stood in shame she encouraged me to love myself.
Whenever I really needed her she was there for me and would call me if I really struggled. So many emails and someone I could just reach out to. She stood by in my sobriety, encouraged me to write my memoirs and helped me in my marriage problems. My relationship with her was really special and she’s an amazing woman. I feel privileged to have been her client and now with three years of sobriety and a whole tool kit of resources and things to help me on this journey. I have friends who I can turn to when things get rough. Again I’m glad I opened my heart to this person even though the pain is hard, my life is changed for the better.
So if your struggling with things in your life I highly recommend finding a counselor that you trust. My life was changed for the best. It took a lot of hard work and sweat but I wanted so much to have freedom. Today I live in Freedom. ❤️